Choose to Change

Start Making Choices

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you're right.” ― Henry Ford

As you begin to read this you have begun to change. We are changed willingly or unwillingly, by life in every passing moment. We even change to keep things the same.

Ironically, we feel powerless to change and believe we can not take the steps to set ourselves on the path we want. Our greatest ally is our greatest enemy and that is ourselves.

Before we go out and start making changes, our home, our job and everything else we must realize the first change is in ourselves. As in all steps toward a closer connection, we must look at ourselves and our motives with honest eyes.

This is not an excuse to applaud ourselves, commiserate at our bad luck, or list our failings. This is about our relationship with ourselves.

Six Barriers To Change

People pressure          

Fit for change                

Face the fear                 

Eyes on the task           

Taking action                 

Know yourself                

Paying the price            

Our self-examination begins with our Ego. How many of our goals, expectations and desires are driven by our peers and environment. When we desire someone's shoes we often desire to be that person. We must re-think how we feel we are percieved by people around us and then ask ourself "Does it really matter?". Do we seek praise or approval from others, do we feign modesty to make that approval sweeter? "Oh this, just something I threw on."

We must look at ourselves, are we harsh on our physical appearance setting expectations far above what we would expect from a friend. Do we seek escape from ourselves through drink, drugs or food. Trying to recreate a lost time that was happier rather than forge a new one. If the change you seek is escape from the physical ties that chain you to the past.

Is our mind fooling us, the formation of our thoughts can be swayed by Ego, Self Esteem and dillusion. Describe some random object and consider is your description filled with facts or layers of opinion and feeling? Are we frightened, do we live life on the edge of a precipice to disaster, feeling fear like a palpable barrier to being ourselves. Fear of change is the greatest you will face but it can be overcome if you focus on the goal.

Our brains work in macroscopic and microscopic views, we look at a jigsaw and we can see the whole picture and yet we can also see the individual pieces of the puzzle. Each way has its value but we can find ourselves stuck in one view or the other. "Everything is awful" or "It will be tidy when that is done." You can see the mountains in the distance or the road at your feet, which do you need to see right now. Find the balance and counter the less good with the great.

Do you wail and vex at the gates to the impossible path while the way to the possible is open. The route may seem longer but it will get the determined soul where they want to be. Problem solving is microscopic, remove each pebble in your way. Goal seeking is macroscopic, find the destination and then get a map. Your change requires effort and the right type of effort, we really achieve doing nothing.

Your change even well planned will be mostly threatened by yourself, so know your enemy. You should know yourself more than anyone so counter your weaknesses, prepare for the times your resolve may be weak. A fat picture on the fridge or a note of caution in a money jar can really work as long as it molded to you. If needed plan your "well done's" or "keep going", even the marathon runner likes to know how far they have come and take a little water on the way. Know yourself and be kind.

All change comes with a price whether that be money, free time, short term ease or even friends. A world trip may seem great until you realize the cost in saving money, working longer, ending careless buying and spending weeks away from family and friends.

Is the change worth that price, if it is then steel your courage and seek your goal.